RiP Steve Jobs - How Apple saved my life...

...does that seem like a theatrically dramatic statement? Maybe it is a tiny bit, but not much.

Who was I? A special needs primary teacher with arty bits when time allowed. Not much time was allowed, but work thankfully had plenty of opportunities for creativity so I didn't miss it too much. Too tired for that.

Who was I? A Fibro fighter. Plenty of time to be creative but in too much pain to feel like it and even if I did, what could I do? There're only a finite number of photo ops when you're housebound, the fatigue and pain are too bad to get out art materials let alone have the energy to use them. I have no space free to get them out and leave them out.
Then there's the matter of how do I hold a brush? I know there are awesome artists out there that hold a brush with their teeth but I couldn't clench my jaw like that. So my world continues to shrink and my mind gets quieter and darker.
Then for some odd reason, possibly because I 'was' a gadget freak, I throw financial caution to the wind and buy an iPhone 3GS. Game apps wake my mind a little and not having to hold anything in my hand but the small light phone means I can play comfortably anywhere. Even in bed. Then I realise there're all sorts of creative apps out there...I make this -

I send it to a friend (another #spoonie who's still managing to work / lecture) she wants to buy it on a button, as do some of her students. Can I do that she asks? I vaguely recall Zazzle, from looking at Fibro awareness tees and investigate. Their design tools are intuitive and allow for quite a bit of creativity even without desktop software. The designer in me starts to re-emerge. My muse begins to tap me on the shoulder again.
Maybe twitter isnt just for empathising and sharing with spoonies...? My world starts to open up even though I'm slowly getting more and more housebound. Online art websites like Flickr and iPA point me in the direction of more creative apps than I could ever have dreamed of.

There's no prep involved, no brush or pencil to hold, the cash outlay is small (for apps, let's not discuss Apple pricing.) and I'm having fun! Even though my world of pain is getting worse and we don't know why, my thoughts are filled with creative ideas rather than suicide.

I doubt that even in my darkest hours I'd really have ended it all. Or ever will. But the fact remains that even if Apple and the visions of Steve Jobs didn't actually save my life, they've sure made it liveable.
And for that I thank them.

Goodbye Steve. I will be forever grateful.

Oh and thanks also to Tim Berners-Lee. I salute you Sir. You and Mr Jobs little black NeXT box (see Stephen Fry's recent blog here.) have made my life more manageable in ways you can't possibly have imagined. A quote from Fry's post;

" I will mourn his loss as a man who changed my world completely."

Who am I? I am blessed.